Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
