Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Randomize
