Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
