Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
