We're like a lot better than the average bears
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
