I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
