I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
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She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
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