i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
cat food counts as protein by the way
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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