i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
