is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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