so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
operation have a gay friend backfired
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
