You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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