I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
