you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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