You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
