her vagine was all disorganized.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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