That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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