evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I just found a bag of teeth...
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize