I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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