I want to have your abortion
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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