i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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