i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
