question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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