Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
We have started to decorate penises.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
