I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
