So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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