I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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