R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
