dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
