Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
