hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
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