Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
