Whod you bang
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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