Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
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