i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize
