As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
