So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
did you just send me my own nude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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