I love black thongs
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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