i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
