Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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