i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
