do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
