i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
