Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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