yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
