Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
