I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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