Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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