One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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