its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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