NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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