Texts From Last Night

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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.

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  (832): I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up. http://tfl.nu/vunl
  Replies (27) Good night (1037) Bad night (1755) Order T-Shirt
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  (254): View more from Texas

  you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room

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  (254): you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room http://tfl.nu/st2q
  Replies (46) Good night (4752) Bad night (1193) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson

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  (973): How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson http://tfl.nu/43b3
  Replies (24) Good night (720) Bad night (2839) Order T-Shirt
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her

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  (706): I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee (704): Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her http://tfl.nu/95cd
  Replies (23) Good night (4410) Bad night (641)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt

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  (239): At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt http://tfl.nu/gv5c
  Replies (12) Good night (2326) Bad night (942) Order T-Shirt
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes

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  (865): I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes http://tfl.nu/sup4
  Replies (8) Good night (3220) Bad night (636) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.

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  (617): He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him. http://tfl.nu/v8g0
  Replies (14) Good night (5624) Bad night (726) Order T-Shirt
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...

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  (763): Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg... http://tfl.nu/nasy
  Replies (44) Good night (2440) Bad night (6324) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .

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  (913): You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" . http://tfl.nu/nj3u
  Replies (1) Good night (1909) Bad night (1014) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name

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  (970): At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name http://tfl.nu/d4zs
  Replies (12) Good night (3740) Bad night (961) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.

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  (781): My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays. http://tfl.nu/1wl2
  Replies (3) Good night (4211) Bad night (675) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag

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  (902): Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag http://tfl.nu/er8z
  Replies (5) Good night (718) Bad night (997) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.

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  (916): I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina. http://tfl.nu/c8ir
  Replies (9) Good night (1223) Bad night (440) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!

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  (512): I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS! http://tfl.nu/2uiu
  Replies (5) Good night (2126) Bad night (443) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks

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  (775): He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks http://tfl.nu/jztr
  Replies (3) Good night (494) Bad night (239)

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