i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Randomize
